So I'm at the bar last night (duh, it was Wednesday) with this hot guy and a couple friends BECAUSE THATS'S HOW I ROLL, and after the serious pool game died down, I downed about 19 high lifes. Wait, that's not the point of this story. I peer over to my left at this kid I know, who shall remain nameless so I don't totally fucking embarass him if anybody actually reads this shit.
He's sitting at the bar, not really surrounded by anyone so that THIS FUCKING CELL PHONE is extra obvious. I was such a complete ass, but I no lie looked at him and started hysterically laughing. Then I went over to him and I was like "WHOA, dude, I didn't know we were digging up artifacts at the bar tonight!" I brutalized his ancient zack morris style cell phone for like 2 solid mins before deciding that I needed a pic of that shit.
So I was like, hang on bro, I GOTTA take a pic of this. And then what did I do to top off my complete asshole behavior? Of course I bust out my fuckin shiny, sexy and sleek touchscreen blackberry to take a picture of this missile. His phone must have felt exactly like Mr. B.A. construction worker from the other night (when i opened his corona. Remembs? Scroll back). If his cell phone had testicles, it's massive body would have sucked them back in right at that moment. Or, since it still had an antenna, I bet the antenna just like slid back inside the phone all embarassed. Hahahahhahahaha. fucking antennas.
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